Understanding life's lessons...

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Accusations...again...

i've never feel more unappreciated than tonight,
all my sincerity is taken with contempt and utter blasphamy...
especially when the expression of unappreciativeness comes along with sacarsm and false accusation...
its ok...
its just a matter of time when the consequences will occur...
i shall not cry this time,
i will be strong,
its not worth crying over such irresponsible actions that occur again and again...
i'm tired...

poison breeds more poison,
lies come along with more lies...
God bless whoever believes in the serpent,
may ur fall will not be too great...

alvinz blogged at 12:02 AM

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Sunday, January 21, 2007

Sleep is the best medicine...

sad...
sorrowful...
miserable...
bad things are just befalling me again and again even though i'm doing good...
so unfair...
how can i solve them?
get rid of them?

i just wanna sleep,
sleep can pass time,
sleep has no sorrows,
and i will have a chance of not waking up...
so why not?

alvinz blogged at 9:06 PM

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Where is the trust?

Really, how any truer can i show myself when i've always been true?
can the truth gets any truer than first hand personal experience?
i've always pride myself for being sociable,
is that gonna be the stumbling block for me?

i can't believe it,
if the trust for me was 70%,
how can a 50% beat it?
and so simply at that?
isn't it sweet talking to me too?
you've never trusted me at all...

trust...
no couple can be in a r/s with no trust...

why must he keep coming back like an irritating fly sprouting nonsense?
Keep saying bad things about me when i've done nothing wrong?
wasn't i already very gentleman to him?
closing one eye when he goes out with u,
never disturbed u guys,
never really say bad things abt him except logically examining the r/s...
why must he backstab me with such false accusations all the time?
is he on the thinking that if he cant have her, then neither can i?
adopting the strategy of "even if there's no chance of us being together, i hope we can be best friends" and remain behind to influence her and break things up between us?
stopping her from finding her happiness in the process?

and knowing that she's prone to distrust herself,
knowing that its her weak point,
he is fully making use of her and his past mistakes...
i find it especially amusing how he tries to give her the hint that i might be nothing more like him, that all guys are like him, that he loves to be with his female friends and dun care whether
his girlfriend likes it or not...

and i cant do anything about it,
why do i have to prove myself all the time?
when i'm always true to u...
everything i say or do with be met with doubts from now onwards,
best lor...
must i show that i'm willing to die for you or even be dead for that matter for u to believe me cos only the dead tells the truth?
i dun mind being scrutinize by PIs even cos i've got nothing to hide!

how can u deny what is true when u've seen and heard and experience your time with me personally?
And even more so when he saw me chatting with my female friends and u just took it to be unfaithful and even treat it as if you saw it with ur own eyes?!
and who knows he could even add a few garnishings in future like "i saw him holding hands with this girl in sch" and you would totally believe such nonsense!
kaoz...

i feel very disappointed...
disappointed that the trust u said u have for me is false,
that you've allowed the same problem to keep coming back,
that you've allowed him to keep coming back to keep us apart...

i guess...
i have to rethink certain things...
if even after we get into a relationship and she continue to allow such back stabbing and distrust between us, we will never last...

alvinz blogged at 7:33 PM

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Thursday, January 11, 2007

Funny me in the new year!