Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Waiting... 1st day...

I guess it has just boil down to this...
This period of indefinite waiting...
And again i'm waiting, and i hope it will be the last waiting period...

why did she take so long to tell me that she feels like she needs to be alone and i even have to dig it out of her before she'll tell me reluctantly?
why when i asked her last sun whether she wanna be alone and she chose to "forget" it?
why did she find it a dilemma to ask me to retreat?
issit becos she finds it hard to tear herself away from me?
issit becos one side of her tells her that she loves me, but another side of her says she's afraid of opening herself up?
issit becos she likes me but finds it a big step to commit herself to me?
issit becos she is afraid of getting hurt again when she gets into a relationship?

so many questions...
in my mind...

i'm breatheless...

but if she dun take this step,
she'll never know whether love is everlasting just as i said...
i'll never have this chance to prove to her that i am what i am and i will do what i said i would do for her...
We'll never have the chance to live out the happiness that comes after this decision...
sigh...
so close yet so far...

i'm not one to sweet talk alot, though most of the nice comments that i usually say of you comes truly from my heart... and usually when i say i will do something, i'll definitely do it...
just as i've done so all these while since you've known me...
Actions always speaks louder than words, and i know that and embraced it as my own personal principle...

but will i be given this chance?

will she pay the price of opening her vulnerable heart to me again in exchange for what i wanna show her and giving her what she always wanted?

i hope i wun have to wait too long...
Hope she can take care of herself without me around her...
loving you everyday...

alvinz blogged at 12:11 PM

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